2015 is definitely the year of leadership for me, and when I first started out in this industry years ago I honestly had no idea what I wanted to do with my life or where I wanted to go.
We didn’t grow up poor, but we were a financially “tight” family. Like most everyone else we had moments of very tough and very trying moments of hardship, like the time we were living in a plywood shack we built ourselves after the house fire…
but my parents always found a way to provide.
They were very hard workers and did the craziest jobs to provide for four kids. Thinking back, there was never really a time that I can remember when both my mom and dad didn’t work. We were a two job household from the go.
The toughest job I remember was when my dad worked all day as a farm hand, and my mom was a live in maid and babysitter for the same family. My dad was gone before the sun came up and we only saw my mom once a week, sometimes twice.
It was the six of us living in a motor home that we didn’t even own, and it was my big sister that made sure me and my two other sister were up and ready for school. And there I was, a little hell raiser, skipping school, getting into fights. Later on, as things got easier I remember my dad used to pick us up from school.
And looking back over the years I can’t help but feel so amazingly grateful for my parents and my sisters and those who helped us.
And deep down, from those years and those that followed I developed this mindset and belief that as the only boy, as my dad’s only son I had a duty and an obligation to help provide for the family.
It wasn’t long until I started doing the same work my dad did. I became a farm hand and worked at a factory and did construction and all sorts of odd jobs, and at one time I worked two full time jobs, seven days a week.
And I’d come home, take a little bit of the money I made and gave the rest to my parents, to help pay bills and put food on the table.
I eventually started college for civil engineering and found out that I had to work on a highway… well I didn’t like construction after years of doing it on and off so I dropped out, and went to trade school to become a network engineer, and then a programmer.
But here’s the thing…
I went on to do so many jobs that when I did get into the MLM and marketing business it was just another way to make money.
I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life, and honestly I believed that while I can start a business, I’d be working for the rest of my life anyway.
I became known as a “good guy to have in your pocket” for others because I was a hard worker, but when it came to doing for myself, I was always less than average.
I was always more comfortable working, until the day I got sick and tired of working. It was right about that time I was working two jobs seven days a week. I was so unbelievable tired.
On more than one occasion I’d wake up just in time to get back into my own lane, and I promise you Jesus was driving the car for me a lot of days, because I’d get off work and I’d remember getting to my car and waking up in my driveway at home wondering how I got there in the first place, because I didn’t remember a single thing between getting off work and waking up at home in my driveway.
I knew there had to be a better way, but becoming a better person never crossed my mind. Becoming a leader never crossed my mind.
It wasn’t even on my radar until recently, when I started learning about leadership.
I’d hear people talk about massive success and I’d see people go on to make a lot of money, and I’d hear the same things over and over, but it never really sunk in that in order to be successful, I had to become a leader, and I didn’t realize what leadership really was either.
How To Inspire People and Build Your Influence
Well, I mentioned the law of the lid: Leadership Ability Determine’s a Person’s Level of Effectiveness. That’s when I learned that I needed to become a leader to succeed.
But there are many other laws…
The one I’m talking about today is the Law of Influence: It states that the true measure of leadership is influence, nothing more, nothing less.
And there are many examples of great leaders, however the one that stuck out for me was Princess Diana. Her influence spread well beyond the wealth, privilege, and position of her husband, and well beyond having a title.
So if I have to become a leader to become successful, and leadership is influence, I have to stop and ask myself, ‘how do I build my influence?’ And thanks to my mentors and the abundance of information and influence of others around me…
One of the best ways to build influence is by inspiring people.
And I don’t mean affirmations, positive thinking or any of that stuff. I mean, you have to set yourself apart from every other “guru” out there and be authentic.
You have to tell your story and use stories to connect with people on a deeper, emotional level, because the truth is that people follow other people.
Why do you think corporations spend billions of dollars on celebrity endorsements?
It’s because they want people to associate their products and services with a person who inspires people. They’re leveraging the leadership of others.
And I tell you the truth, especially so today, people are sick and tired of hyped up, over sold lies. I mean everyone has a built in bullshit detector that goes off when you start talking about the dream and the benefits and all of that stuff.
People don’t care that your business has the greatest comp plan since the moonwalk. People don’t care about who the founder is and his life story and the motivation behind the company.
What people really want is something real and something honest. The other thing they want is someone that can relate to them. It’s called empathy, being able to relate to people on a level more than just skin deep.
So how do you do that? How do you inspire people and build your influence?
Tell your story. Be honest with people. Tell them who you are and share your authentic story. Empathize with them. That’s how you connect with people on a deeper level, and if you can do that, they will follow you.
Using Stories To Get A Point Across
Here’s a question. If you’re in a business now, what is it that you remember most? What connects with you most?
Do you remember the facts about the business? Or do you remember the stories and illustrations?
Well, I’ve learned that most people? They remember the illustrations.
When you look at the greatest orators and leaders in our history, they were all storytellers. In the modern day we have Anthony Robbins, John Maxwell and many, many others. Historically there isn’t anyone bigger than Jesus – we call them parables.
Two of the most prominent in my own life are from one of my mentors, Chris Record, and someone who isn’t a mentor, but someone I listen to often, Tony Rush.
The very first illustration I learned was about mindset and having the proper focus on value. Chris used an illustration about air, food and water and I promise I will share that with you in tomorrow’s post, but it’s something that’s always stuck with me.
And from Tony, I’m not even sure where to start. He shared the story of a hound dog that wouldn’t move even though he was on a nail. It was a story about pain and motivation, (yes, I’ll share that one too).
And now that you’re armed with that it of knowledge, here’s something to put into practice.
Once you’ve learned to connect with people on a deeper level, start learning to use stories to get your point across. Learn to use metaphors and illustrations because these are the things that they will remember.
Nobody cares about the details of the comp plan; Not really anyway. So forget the facts, lay off the hype and start telling your story, and using stories to reach people.
Applying this to my business has helped improve my conversion rates and helped me recruit faster and easier, and it’s the best way I’ve found to answer the question of how to inspire people and build your influence.
I know this was a long post and if you’re still here believe me when I say I truly appreciate you for being here.
I have a very important question for you…
Would you be interested in learning advanced marketing strategies that I’m using right now to get more traffic, leads and sales in my personal business? It’s a strategy that clients are also paying me $3,000 per year to do for them.
Follow the link, watch the video, then get started learning this advanced strategy. It is a game changer!
Hey I love you guys!
See you tomorrow…
~Dexter
